Written
By: Jenne
Someone
once wrote that buying a vibrator/dildo
is like buying a pair of shoes. Ummm, excuse
me, but I think there is a world of difference
between the two. For a start, when I walk
into a shoe shop and I get to try before
I buy, I know what size shoe I take or at
least I can get it measured, and lastly
there is always a helpful assistant on hand.
None of things in general apply to sex shops,
on or off-line in my experience.
I
know where they were going with that analogy
though, buying, choosing a dildo/vibrator
is/should be a personal thing. The color,
texture, type that you choose are all personal
choices.
Click
on any on-line adult store and chances are
you'll be amazed and sometimes bewildered
by the variety that is offered. So where do
you start? Personally I find at the beginning
the best place! My advise for what it's worth,
is to go back to basics and ask yourself a
few simple questions before you buy.
Is
this vibrator/dildo just for you, or will
you be using it with your partner?
A
word of caution here for any men that maybe
reading. I wouldn't advise buying one for
your partner and just leaving it in a box
on the bed, gift wrapped or not. Vibrators
and the choice of is very much a personal
thing. Okay, she may have said in the throws
of passion one night that she wanted a 15"
one that glowed in the dark, but that doesn't
mean she does in the cold light of day. Talk
it over if you are buying with your partner
in mind.
What
type of stimulation are you looking for? Clitoral,
vaginal, anal or a mixture? Try to determine
what type of stimulation you find most enjoyable.
So
what's the difference between a dildo and
a vibrator? I hear you asking.
Vibrator
Vibrators
come in a great variety of shapes. All as
the name suggests vibrate but they can be
small or large, have a separate handle or
not, be long or wide, etc, etc. Some can be
inserted, but generally, they are used for
clitoral stimulation. Most are powered by
battery but some run via the mains electric.
The battery operated ones are more portable
and therefore on the whole more popular.
Dildo
Dildos,
on the other hand, generally refer to cylindrical
shaped often used for insertion. Some are
made to look and even feel like a real penis.
Some are made to look like animals and other
fanciful creatures. The main thing is that
they are long, narrow and insertable.
The
above definitions are just general pointers
as the two often overlap. In other words,
some dildos vibrate, some vibrators look like
real penises.
It's
probably better to start "small"
both in size and intensity whether you decide
to buy a dildo or a vibrator. Let's face it,
you can always upgrade later. If you're a
couple here's a good game to play as you browse
the store. Try making up your own names for
the various dildos/vibros you find. I guarantee
you will be falling on the floor by the time
you reach the tenth name. This is about having
fun as well as remember!
So
you finally make your choice, pay and then
you wait. A couple of days later, your stood
there with this object in your hand wondering
what possessed you to ever buy one in the
first place. If your solo then play around,
bear in mind that some women find direct clitoral
stimulation to intense, if this is the case
then try using it in different positions,
or using it through a towel. Once you find
the position that works for you then you'll
understand why vibrators outsell any other
sex toy on the market.
Some
people worry that if they pleasure themselves
this way they will end up unable to have an
orgasm with a man. There is no evidence to
suggest this is true, in fact research indicates
that the opposite is true. This probably explains
why sex therapists, the world over, endorse
the use of sex toys. It's an ideal way to
learn the sensations that your body responses
to. Many women that have difficulty reaching
orgasm have found the use of vibrators beneficial
and that's official!
If
you're a couple, it's time to play, experiment
and above all have fun. Guys, running around
the room, brandishing your new light sabre,
whilst declaring you are the new Luke Skywalker,
is not the way to impress the woman of your
dreams. Okay, I know I said have fun but...
Go
gently, let your partners body and reactions
be your guide. If she's used a vibrator or
dildo before and she's comfortable with the
idea, watch and learn as she shows you her
techniques. There's no reason why you can't
use it on yourself or allow her too either
for that matter.
Depending
on what you choose to buy depends on how you
use it. Play around, experiment and you'll
be surprised how much you'll learn. It's a
great form of foreplay, teasing and playing
with her. For example, trying running a vibrator
over her nipples, before moving it over her
stomach, eventually ending up between her
inner thighs. Something else you might like
to try is to use your tongue on her clitoris
as you GENTLY insert the vibrator/dildo inside
her. This is guaranteed to get her juices
flowing.
When
you decide that the foreplay is over don't
discard the vibrator, if you both enjoy doggie
style as a position, a great way to doubly
stimulate her is to gently rub the vibrator
across her clitoris as you enter her. Use
your imagination, as long as your both comfortable
with an idea and it's safe, then try it. Which
brings me onto a couple of important points:
Using
a vibrator anally can be pleasing, but please
NEVER
ever let go of it. The sphincter muscles produce
powerful contractions and you really don't
want to end up in the ER room explaining exactly
how it got up there, do you?
If
you use a vibrator anally apply the same rules
you would if a man had used his penis. Never
go from the anus back to the vagina, as you
could carry normal bacteria from the rectum
to the vagina, which is not normal there.
Always
make sure that you buy from a reputable company
such as Libida.com Chances are you are going
to at some point insert this toy into yourself
and it's not worth taking a chance for a few
cents less.
Have
fun...
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